Hot Spots I

"Just to be sure: the use of the spa facilities is co-ed and in the nude."

It is with these friendly words of warning that I was cordially invited to the first place on my newest quest, visiting 5-10 saunas in the Amsterdam and Haarlem area over the coming weeks. And with winter arriving with full force, warming up seems like a solid plan.

Some long-time readers might recall the first time I dipped my, er, toe into the European world of saunas here.

Since that nerve-wracking first time, where I had to shed not only all clothing but also 30+ years of North American conservatism (only with regards to public nudity, I should add), it seems I have embraced my inner (and now outer) nudist.

I figure now is the time to go and feel relatively secure, before pastries, age, and Dutch cheese take their toll.

With this in mind, a number of places in the city have agreed to let me in, and in some cases interview the owner/manager.

First up, Haarlem's Sauna van Egmond.

This place is a must-visit - it provides the perfect Dutch gezellig feeling as soon as you walk in - lounge areas, a large fireplace, a movie room with plush couches, stillness rooms for taking a nap, a restaurant. All with soft lights and dark corners. Then there are the steam rooms, saunas (infra-red and regular), hot tubs, cold tubs, rooftop terrace, full salon and swimming pool.

I met with K.C, the amiable manager who has been at SvE for 22 years. He walked me through the facility and provided most of the information. "People are here for a good time," he mentioned right away. "There are no grumpy people once they walk through the doors."

Decidedly un-grumpy, and armed with a robe, slippers, and towels, I was on my way...

Pre-sauna. I exhaled shortly after this photo was taken.

Since: 1974. The building itself is not very old, but the decor has been made to look "vintage" - and it could easily double as a museum.

Client mix: about 95% Dutch, 5% tourist

Age range and gender: The sauna is for those 14+, but the vast majority are over 20 at least. During my visit - 11am-2pm on a frosty Tuesday - it was 70% female, with a few couples. Ages ranged from 22 to about 65.

Weekends and evenings bring a more 50-50 male/female split. For those trying to visualize the mix: picture your oldest aunt and uncle naked, as well as the girl or guy next door.

Cost: 27Euros for the full day, robe and towels extra but people also can bring their own.

Most interesting story: There have been several wedding proposals here, according to K.C. - in the nude, in full view of the other patrons. (I did not ask where the groom hid the ring).

The vibe: Relaxed. This is NOT a pick-up place. Most people are in couples, or mothers and daughters, or friends. Hushed conversations and only occasional chats with strangers occur. "People mind their own business here," says K.C. (Plus, what would your opening line be anyway? "Hmm, sure is hot in here?")

Average stay: According to K.C, the average visit can range from 3-5 hours. Though some people spend the full day - 10am-11pm. With movies, naps, steam sessions, reading areas, food, and drinks, it is possible to stay this long. Steam and time evaporate here.

Most interesting moment: At one point, I was the only male in a sauna with 7 women. Some outweighed me. I would suggest that this is very good practice for those looking to lower their inhibitions, as I had to walk past them all to get to the only available space to sit.

The verdict: An absolute must-visit when you come to Amsterdam. It's a short train or bus ride to Haarlem and a very novel experience for us non-Northern Europeans. It's also pure relaxation, pure atmosphere and a first-class facility. Plus, you get to keep the slippers.

(Photos below are from the Sauna van Egmond brochure)

Film Fest

The purpose of life is to increase the warm heart - Dalai Lama

I love documentaries. I love them the way Dutch people love birthday calendars in their bathrooms. The way Parisians love strikes. I love them the way Dan Brown loves italics.

With that in mind, it seemed fitting to see Love Etc as my first movie at this year's IDFA.

It's year 23 of the International Documentary Film Festival, year two for me at this great 10-day cinematic smorgasbord. The full program is immense - over 250 films, with 10 days and four locations throughout the city. Each film is either done in English or has English subtitles.

So with limited time and only two eyeballs, how does one choose which ones to see? You look for some award winners and some with topics of interest (last year's Rainbow Warriors of Waiheke Island is still clearly in my mind).

Love Etc follows a number of people in various stages of relationships in New York City. An elderly couple with the wife suffering from the early stages of dementia, a young Indian couple getting married, a divorced blue-collar single dad, a gay single man about to adopt baby twins, and a pair of 18-year olds. It's filled with the requisite NYC sights, energy and authenticity, and each profile makes you think about your own relationships. Check out the trailer here.

Herbstgold (Autumn Gold) is about several men and women from parts of Europe (Austria, Germany, Italy, Czech Republic) preparing for and competing in the track and field World Masters Championships in Finland. The catch? The youngest person featured is 84, and the oldest is 100. It follows their lives, their relationships (most of them have lost a husband or wife) and their training. It's an incredible movie - touching, funny, wrinkled, and inspiring. The trailer is here.

If you're looking to get off the couch, think, or just increase the warm heart, catch both movies and see the way Albert and Marion still treat each other after 48 years of marriage, and how a 100-year-old discus thrower spends his training time.

Bloemendaal aan Zee

A very compelling reason to live in Haarlem is the proximity to the sea.

The whole area is a unique part of the country. Whereas you can't swing a dead cat in the Netherlands without hitting a canal or a fiets, a trip to the coastal towns of Zandvoort and Bloemendaal takes you through dunes that you don't see in most parts. These big, winding (and environmentally protected) sand dunes go for miles in several directions.

An easy 30-45 minute bike ride from Haarlem brings you to Bloemendaal aan Zee - a huge chunk of North Sea beach lined with cafes and clubs. The bike ride itself takes you along a winding path through the dunes for a good 15 minutes, with dozens of stops along the way to take a breather and check out the view.

The beach is apparently packed in the summer, at least on each of the 3.5 warm days here between June and September. In fall and winter, as this past weekend showed, it is a great spot when the sun is shining for a long walk and a lunch with coffee or a drink.

These straw roofs (rooves?) are popular in higher-end neighbourhoods in Holland. This one was spotted between Haarlem and Zandvoort.

The views from the dunes

Get to Know an Amsterdammer 2

As I continue to approach strangers and ask them for a few minutes of their time (and so far no punches or slaps), I met up with a local musician at Amsterdam's classic Cafe de Jaren, a sprawling two-level bar/restaurant with a canal-side terrace that is packed on summer evenings. This being November, however, we opted to stay in.

Some brief background info here:

This Amsterdammer was downsized from his sales job at Monster last year. He's been singing for years on the side, made the leap fully late in 2010, and in just under a year has landed the title song for a Reebok campaign (beating out OutKast, among others) and connecting with some big music industry movers in Holland and Los Angeles.

His first album is due in 2011. Check out his YouTube channel here. Check out his site (and cheeky Reebok ad) here.

Name: Steffen Morrison

Age: 31

Profession: Singer

How long have you lived in Amsterdam?

I arrived from Suriname on Oct. 4, 1992 in Amsterdam. Which makes it eighteen years for me.

List three quick words to describe the city, the first things that come to mind.

Diverse, Vibrant, A Living Postcard (Ed. note - it looks like five words after the Euro~Dollar exchange rate).

What are some of your favourite things about living here?

I love the canals in Amsterdam. These truly give the city its own unique character and identity. One of the other conveniences of this city is that you are literally 15 to 30 minutes away from everything by bike. Also, there is so much to be discovered about this city in general in terms of its history. Even for us who live in Amsterdam, at times we feel like a tourist because you discover so much daily.

Nightlife-wise, Paradiso and Sugar Factory are great for special shows.

What do you like the least about living here?

People on the bike tend to be pretty impatient. (Ed. - Er, yes. I just clobbered someone yesterday on the bike... more later). The fact there isn't much room for more tolerance in that area is something I would want to change about this city.

If you weren't living here, where would you want to live?

I would want to live in Los Angeles if I wasn't living in Amsterdam.

Oddservations

Some interesting views in and around Amsterdam and Haarlem over the past three days....

Seen: at Albert Cuyp street market

"Um, ok, give me one of those and two of those, jerkface."

Eaten: in Bloemendaal Aan Zee, at a snack shack

This is "Mexicano", a deep fried concoction involving some kind of ground meat.

As with many of Holland's culinary treats, created for maximum convenience and viscosity, it's best to take a page from the U.S. military's "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy.

Seen: At a highway exit ramp leading to Amsterdam

Of all the reactions one might have to the above scenario, the disdain evident on this fellow's face seems the least likely. Although I would probably buy that suit.

Seen: at the same exit ramp, facing the above billboard

This seems to be a more appropriate reaction.

Seen: on bus 176 from Amsterdam to Haarlem

This security screen appears in almost every bus here.

The Comfort Meter is of particular interest to me. How do they know? Isn't 9 a bit high? Obviously they aren't aware of the Mexicano I ate earlier.

London Not Calling

Maybe I've just been unlucky. Maybe I haven't seen the best of the city. Maybe, though, there's a reason that movies like Children of Men and 28 Days have been set there.

London has that gloomy, post-apocalyptic feel that envelops you as soon as you enter the half-outside, half-inside automated netherworld that is the shuttle taking you from Gatwick's North terminal to its South terminal. It was there again as I spent arrived for a writing course last week.

Stepping into the Underground (an ominous name itself), you hear cool, clinical automated voices telling you to "Mind the Gap" ad nauseum, and buses have those creepy security screens in full view of all passengers that seem to presage a mugging. Work being done on the rails or the odd strike is also a very common occurence, so your travels can get bogged down in a hurry.

The city EATS money as well, in the manner of shoebox-sized hotel rooms for 120 pounds/night, shuttles (the Gatwick Express expressly makes your wallet lighter for 17 pounds for a one-way train ticket into the city), and an added 17 pounds for 24 hrs of wireless access at the hotel.

Yes, it has its charms - a huge selection of great restaurants and takeaway spots, mostly very friendly people, a royal family to easily make fun of, and neighborhoods like Notting Hill.

But you can feel the unspoken class warfare as well, and the gulf between the 'avs and the 'avnots is easily visible in the form of numerous private clubs, high-end cars, and the barely concealed contempt in so many hotel staffers' eyes.

Perhaps, as I say, I have just been unlucky on my four visits there, with a total of 3 hours of sunshine. Maybe I need a better spot to stay and more insider knowledge. Or buckets of money. Or, maybe Clive Owen and all those zombies were angry for a reason.

Meer Haarlem

So, this weekend was spent in London for a writing course - more later, on the course and on my least favourite big city so far.

For now, some more bucolic images of Haarlem as it continues to work its magic. Only 4 more weeks though...

Angle of Haarlem

Alright, the weather has broken; or at least, it is cloudy but not raining.

Some initial impresssions:

• Haarlem is home to close to 150,000 people, and it is much whiter than Amsterdam.
• Huge green spaces and trails give it a much more spacious feeling than its neighbour to the east
• There's a very good mix of the old and the new - stately 17th century buildings and homes are juxtaposed with modern offices and shops.
• Its core is pedestrian- and bike-only.
• The Grote Markt (Big Market) in the center of downtown is exactly the kind of European market you want to see - stalls offering the best in cheese, meats, bread, and sweets, all against the backdrop of towering church towers and cobblestone streets.
• It wouldn't be Holland without canals winding their way throughout the city and the nearby communities.

Essentially, it is a more manageable, bite-sized version of bustling Amsterdam. It feels like the kind of place that offers a more relaxed lifestyle, where if you want an occasional injection of adrenaline you can hop a car, bus, or train and be tapping your veins in the big city in 30 minutes.

Fiat, for 'Fix It Again, Tony'

Golfers come here to work on their short game

Old and new

Haarlem

Faithful readers... I am now in Haarlem for a month, and by all appearances so far it is a great little city some 20kms west of Amsterdam.

This will soon become more apparent to you via photos and stories (with occasional forays into Amsterdam still). BUT - it has been cloudy and raining for 2+ weeks, and I need some sun for the pictures. Stay tuned...

In the meantime, enjoy a book suggestion:

The Wave by Susan Casey - non-fiction, all about the science and more about the people chasing big waves around the world. Fascinating, freaky, inspiring.

Get to Know an Amsterdammer

In the first of another semi-regular series that will be appearing on these pages, you'll meet an Amsterdammer and find out their views and perspectives on this interesting and infinitely contrasted place.

The profiles you read won't be limited to life-long Dutch people, mind you. I will be providing as genuine a snapshot as I can of the place, which means speaking with a big range of people, from expats to visitors to whoever won't punch me in the face as I approach them randomly.

I stumbled upon our first interviewee in a local Coffee Company. These places (a dozen or so in Amsterdam) serve up pretty average coffee and equally mediocre snacks, but they make up for it in coziness and good people-watching, whether you're sitting at a long communal table or outside anytime it's not snowing.

Name: Marc

Age: 39

Profession: Account Manager for one of the big insurance companies in Holland

How long have you lived in Amsterdam?

All my life, so 29 … eh … 39 years. I was born in the neighbourhood called ‘de Kinkerbuurt’ at the edge of the centre. During university I started living with my girlfriend in the centre, just 5 minutes walk to the east of ‘de Leidseplein’. After 7 years we moved to the other side, near the ‘Elandsgracht’, and doubled in size (two children).

List three quick words to describe the city, the first things that come to your mind:

Versatile, free and intense!

What are some of of your favourite things about living here? (These can be specific places, bars, stores, parks, neighbourhoods, and/or general feelings about the people or the vibe - really anything you can think of). (Ed. - Marc provided almost all the website links as well, which was enormously helpful)

I really like the accessibility of things and people in Amsterdam. The way you and I met for example, in the Coffee Company. It’s most of the time possible to ask anybody anything. Everybody is living apart together. [Note from Editor: "living apart together" is a great expression]. Feels a little like a village.

Also Amsterdam has four seasons, so every emotion of life and nature passes through during the year. I like that for the balance.

Favourite saying from the Dutch rock artist and painter Herman Brood who lived in Amsterdam: “I don’t collect money, I collect moments."

My favourite spots are:

‘Het Vondelpark’ (our own Central Park). We use this park for almost everything. Recreation (with the children), sports, hangout with friends, birthdayparties, ice skating, passing through by bike on our way to school, BBQ’s, music festivals, Queensday, and so on.

‘Coffee Company’: for socialising/meeting friends and people, working (wifi access), reading newspapers (our dutch Starbucks).

‘Burgermeester’ for the best Dutch hamburger [Editor's second note: I strenuously disagree with this one, having just been to Cafe Parck; but it's Marc's interview, not mine, so I will shut up].

‘Het Kaasboertje’: cheese-store in ‘de Pijp’, where they know everything about cheese and you’re not allowed to buy anything without tasting first.

‘Foodware’: fresh organic take-away food, cooked with passion (I sound like an ad).

‘Rakang’: my favourite thai-food restaurant. Service with the biggest smile (try the ‘Tom Ka Kai’ soup).

‘Van Dobben’: my favourite place for a fast Dutch lunch (but open till 2:00 am), especially a ‘broodje kroket’ and their Filet Americain. [Editor's third and perhaps final note; Filet Americain is a reddish spread of dubious origins that is a huge favourite among Nederlanders]

‘Holtkamp’: royal dutch pastries (lemon merenque pie and also ‘kroketten’).

‘De 9 straatjes’: nice little shopping streets with all kind of shops.

‘Artis’: our town zoo/parc.

‘Ben Cohen’: best shoarma place.

‘Sichuan’: Chinese restaurant with a superb (Michelin star) Peking Duck menu

‘IJscuypje’: icecreamstore

‘Spare Time’: clothing store

‘The Old Man’: Boardstore

Clubs:

Sugar Factory

Paradiso

Melkweg

Westergasfabriek

Panama

Tuschinski art deco movie theatre

I can go on for hours...

Other favourites: Museums, our canal(house)s, expensive shopping in the PC Hooftstraat, ice skating at ‘het Museumplein’.

All sights are walkable (is that a word?) [Ed. - yes], but a real ‘Amsterdammer’ uses a bicycle (with children seats and a big basket for groceries).

What do you like the least about living here?

Parking policy/costs, all the construction works (new subway Noord-Zuidlijn), Amsterdam Noord neighbourhood.

If you weren't living here, where would you want to live?

San Francisco, USA. Been there a few times, has the same vibe as Amsterdam in a way.

Foreign Fun

Part of the fun of experiencing new cultures is to see how they manage to translate their words into the English language, or at least a distant cousin of it.

In Lisbon recently, the menu for a seafood-filled 'Spaghetti Mediterraneo' offered a delicious combination of 'octopus, shrimp, and selfish with oil', which was at once a source of laughter and a painful reminder of my hormonal teenage years.

The sign below was seen at a hotel gym in Carcavelos, not far from Lisbon but far from motivating. The 'need to use Snickers' to enter the gym seems a little counter-productive.

Just last night at Amsterdam's excellent Cafe Parck, a fantastic hamburger can be followed by the slightly less appetizing-sounding 'apple pie and wipe cream':

I'll be on the lookout for more - perhaps as my own form of payback for repeatedly massacring a few foreign languages myself in the past 12 months.